So we're in wedding season right now.  I like going to weddings because its a chance to get dressed up, and eat good food and dance and whatnot with people you sort of know, but not all that much.  Most of the wedding receptions I've been involved with were the ones at Sunnyside.  I worked them.  But it was always fun to see what the bride and bridesmaids were wearing.  I'm also in a wedding this summer.  My best friend from elementary school and junior high is getting married to her high school sweetheart.  She is 20 years old, and he will be 22 when they wed.  I think that is way too young in this day and age.  I understand that they are madly in love and they will most likely spend their entire lives together, but concerning me, I would not be able to marry at this age.  I met a man I thought I was supposed to marry earlier this year.  Turns out, he wasn't the guy, so be it.  But the real reason I'm making a post is because all that shit about girls dreaming of their wedding day.  Supposedly a girl's wedding day is supposed to be the biggest day of her life, the day that she has ALWAYS dreamed of.  To be honest, yes I do want to get married.  Yes, it will be a wonderful day, but it is NOT a day I spend dreaming about.  I was never one of those little girls who dreamed of what she would look like on her wedding day and stuff.  I don't know if I even want a big wedding, and thats almost blasphemous to some people.  When I tell people that I'm not sure if my parents will even be at my wedding they freak out.  I plan to either elope to a wonderful destination, or plan to get married spur of the moment to someone I am engaged to.  It will be spontaneous and delightful, or it will be relaxing and amazing.  But I can almost guarantee that neither my mom nor my dad will be walking me down an aisle.  And honestly, if I didn't put any pressure on myself to have children by the time I am 40, I don't think I would be in any sort of rush to get married.  There are too many things I want to do in my life.  I see what marriage is like.  Not really sure if it is worth it.  And I'm not even sure if I want to have children, so I shouldn't worry about anything right now.  But wedding season?  Fuck it if it weren't for free food and booze.

something that has been on my mind lately, more so always, is boys.  i like boys, a lot.  my friends feel the same way.  i know i am as guilty of this as my friends, but i just don't understand why girls do stupid things because of boys.  as in, why do girls make themselves so available to boys. this just boggles my mind.  smart girls get stupid because they like lame boys.  that is all.  dating is not necessary.  yes, it is nice to have someone around, but is it absolutely necessary?  not in the least, that is what friends are for.  the physical stuff is nice, yes, but one can do without it.  ha.  i suppose, anyway.  i also thought the other day how when an individual starts out in a relationship, they always know in the back of their mind that it will end, but they always have the best hopes of it lasting.  but when a friend starts seeing someone, that individual KNOWS it will not last, and it is more a timebomb...when will it end, not if it will end.
now...that is all.

oh boy.